STD Greeting Cards: You need these!

Doktor Ross SewageLeave a comment

My fiancee and I have been mulling about on a project for some time now. Probably, like, a year. Touring and stuff often gets in the way of fun stuff like this. Finally, however, I was able to make some time. It is here I am for the first time displaying our first ever joint artistic effort; STD greeting cards.

I’ve gone and screen printed four different cards, all featuring just the most adorable little animal I could draw. These are going to be sold as a set of four, bundled up all cute, and just in time for the holidays! What makes these so special, besides my amazing art and a wonderful four color screen printing job? The messages inside… each one has a different message declaring from the sender to the sendee an APOLOGY for whatever SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED DISEASE you might have given them. You had to know the idea was gonna get sick at some point, right?

Continue reading “STD Greeting Cards: You need these!” →

Sewer Bæby part 3: GCB-95 Crybaby mods

Doktor Ross Sewage1 Comment

In the last installment of this thrilling three part series, I covered the internal changes I made to my Crybaby GCB-95 wah, which became my treasured Sewer Bæby. Being that was one of my first excursions into pedal modifications, I decided to take it all the way to learn a thing or three. I wanted to muck about with the aesthetics to show pride in my work, so I learned at least one way to reskin this cat.

painted wah shell

The best way to paint any stomp box is powder coating. That’s the process whereby particles of color are electro-magnetically applied to a metal and then cooked on to form a super protective layer of paint. That’s the way the pros do it. I’m not a pro. I didn’t have the luxury of owning a powder coating system when I did this and I imagine most people never will. Cans of paint it is.

Continue reading “Sewer Bæby part 3: GCB-95 Crybaby mods” →

Ghoulection 2012: Transmission Fifteen

Doktor Ross SewageLeave a comment

It has been an amazing year for us, but ahead is Europe in early 2013 with our “buds” and Tankcrimes label mates, Cannabis Corpse. We ended our 2012 run of shows with a real bang of a weekend. The first show on Friday, November 16th, was with Tankcrimes label mates Vitamin X. The show itself was a Tankcrimes joint. Our own “fifth member” Scott Bryan was currently working with GWAR, so this weekend we drafted Mr. Tankcrimes himself, Scotty Karate. Tankcrimes, Tankcrimes, Tankcrimes!

Ghoul Metro flyer 2012

Some zipper heads might recognize this flyer as having been outside the Metro the same day they were paying twice as much to see the “Misfits all-star cover band featuring Jerry, only.” Ah, c’est la vie, how to compete with a legend? Well, you pack a smaller room with a bunch of numbskulls who beat the shit out of each other, that’s how.

Continue reading “Ghoulection 2012: Transmission Fifteen” →

Torture of Duty: Impaled gets Napalm Wasted

Doktor Ross Sewage1 Comment

November 12th was an epic night for metal in Oakland, California. Napalm Death and Municipal Waste bringing us a show of epic proportions.

napalm death flyer metro

Along with long-time metal stalwarts and former locals, Exhumed, punk legends and actual locals, Attitude Adjustment, and last and probably least, our own gang in Impaled, you’ve got a bill worth getting in line for. A big fucking line.

You like Slayer? Me TOO!
You like Slayer? Me TOO!

Continue reading “Torture of Duty: Impaled gets Napalm Wasted” →

Sewer Bæby part 2: GCB-95 Crybaby mods

Doktor Ross SewageLeave a comment

The Sewer Bæby… MY Sewer Bæby. This was one of my first pedal modification projects and it still remains one of the favorite effects I own. What happens when you take a salvaged, humble Dunlop Crybaby GCB-95 Wah and mod it? Falling into the rabbit hole of pedal geekery is one thing. Having a wah custom to your tastes is second. I’ve already written about how I added true-bypass and a much needed power indicating LED to this little guy. Next, I got into the guts and made it a kick ass bass wah: my fucking BABY.

modded sewer baby wah

The wah circuit is quite simple in terms of the quantity of parts. It’s a very interesting circuit, though, as it’s application wasn’t even intended by the inventors. It was supposed to be a mid-boost, but instead acted as a variable band-pass filter that simulated the human voice. If you’re interested in the intricacies of it, there’s no better article than The Technology of Wah Pedals over at Geofex.com. Alternatively, you can do just as I did: dive in based on a bunch of photos and descriptions of sound to shape up the tone of your wah.

Continue reading “Sewer Bæby part 2: GCB-95 Crybaby mods” →

Sewer Bæby part 1: GCB-95 Crybaby mods

Doktor Ross Sewage2 Comments

Going back, way back, I found a broken Dunlop GCB-95 Crybaby wah pedal in our jam space. I thought, huh, maybe I could use this if I figure out what was wrong with it. It turned out to be a loose battery clip, easily fixed. Then I thought, huh, sounds okay, what would make it sound better? A few internet searches later, I was led down the rabbit hole into the wild and wooly (more like impractical and laborious) world of modifying effects pedals. With a bit more knowledge under the belt, it’s time reevaluate what I did and look at what is still one of my favorite pedals on my board, the Sewer Bæby.

modded Crybaby wah

It’s a little beat up after a some years touring, but the hot rod paint job I gave the Sewer Bæby to distinguish it from yer typical Crybaby still looks alright. Of course none of that matters; it’s the inside that counts, right? Tell that to whomever you set on a blind date with Temple Grandin.

Continue reading “Sewer Bæby part 1: GCB-95 Crybaby mods” →

Ghoulection 2012: Transmission Fourteen

Doktor Ross SewageLeave a comment

We were invited by our friend Shlak to play the New Jersey Death Fest 4 this past weekend. With friends like Shlak, who needs enemas? We met this crazy mother fucker some years back after we’d watched him wrap himself in barbed-wire and staple dollars to his head while bleeding everywhere during a set with his old band, Call the Paramedics. You never could imagine a sweeter, more cordial fellow caked in blood. We flew out for what was sure to be a night of steady blast beats and pinch harmonics. We wouldn’t fit in at all.

NJDFHARTSMALL

This was going to be an epic weekend. We would play the fest, stay in New Jersey, and then follow it up with a sweet show at St. Vitus in Brooklyn. It WAS going to be a sweet weekend. Some colossal shit dickery occurred between some members of our band, promoters, and bookers which led to a misunderstanding that wasn’t revealed until days before the event. We had to cancel the Brooklyn show. All I can say is, my dick remained free of any shit. As it stood, we had a lot of fun in New Jersey, despite, or maybe because of, the chaos.

Continue reading “Ghoulection 2012: Transmission Fourteen” →

Dead Alive: Emergency Speaker Repair

Doktor Ross Sewage4 Comments

With all the emphasis on amplifiers, pedals, cabinets, the humble speaker is oft forgotten. It’s the final destination for your signal and it’s the only thing you actually hear. What’s in your cabinet? If your speakers are crap, who cares that your amp is hand-wired? It’ll still sound like crap. For this discussion, what if it’s broken? Can you tell? The most common injury to a speaker will not necessarily stop it from working, but it won’t work well. When yer speaker cone rips, your tone cannot.

speaker rip

The first time I employed the following fix, I was on the road with my friend Christy. One night, we noticed her guitar sounded terrible. Upon inspection, the sound person had mic’ed a G12T-75 speaker in her cabinet that had a hole in the cone. Three other speakers had been somewhat masking the bad one, but that terrible sound had been coming out all along. We fixed it using an old roadie trick invented back before Guitar Centers were on every corner. Now that Guitar Centers don’t even carry guitar speakers, this old roadie trick is handy again.

Continue reading “Dead Alive: Emergency Speaker Repair” →