Apple Computer is such an annoying corporation. They make these tiny changes to their stupid cords because they expect all of us to be rich tech bros upgrading our shit constantly. Well, I’m a cheap skate and I’m still rocking a seven-year-old laptop. But I did lose my charger. It was a MagSafe 1 charger. You know what’s incredibly hard to find now? MagSafe 1 chargers. Well, it turns out MagSafe 2 is the same fucking thing, just slightly different in size.
I picked up this old charger off craigslist for $20. It was late, we met in front of a grocery store, and I didn’t realize it had the wrong end until I got home. Dammit. Do I call the guy back? Do I try and sell this one myself? Or do I fuck it all up on my own DIY like I always do? You can guess the answer.
While I wait for a bunch of other cool shit to appear, this release follows hot on the heels of the last Sodom re-issue that I did layouts for. Persecution Mania: Sodom’s second full length (and really superior to the first) available for order now from Wax Maniax.
This is quite a cool package. Doubly vinyl, gatefold, full lyrics, etc. This release has never been better. But it’s not for want of trying to be worse. It seems that when it comes to the 1980s, there was a little to be desired in terms of archiving all the media that went into creating such a milestone record of thrash metal.
Our band recorded a tune for Image Comics’The Humans graphic novel series by Keenan Marshall Keller and Tom Neely. It’s a cool comic set in the ‘70s and follows a motorcycle gang’s exploits, but with a twist; in this world, the gangs are all apes and actual humans are primitive beasts kept around for sport. Each issue of The Humans is accompanied by two original songs released online from bands such as Goblin Cock and Witches of God. Our song, “Humans Till Deth”, is an octane-fueled surf-thrash tune attached to the release of issue #8 on October 7.
The song is available for download from the Humans Soundcloud page. I was so excited by the tune, I decided to put a video together for it. I used nothing but iMovie, some old television clips, and art from Tom Neely.
We recorded the tune at a new studio to us, Antisleep, with Scott Evans. I think it came out rad and I’m pretty pumped to start recording the new album there in December.
I had a very frustrating conversation the other day about a fade out on a song. I thought it sounded too fast. To me, it sounded very linear. I was trying to explain it should be a logarithmic fade out. Sarcastically, I was told I should teach a class on the subject if I flippin’ knew so much. So fuck it, class is in session. When speaking about audio, what does one mean when using the terms “linear” and “logarithmic?”
For a linear fade out, a linear equation of the dB decrease could be shown simply as y=e*x+dB, where e is a negative number. That’s a straight line heading downward. When speaking about “logarithms” in audio applications, though, it’s actually describing several things: exponential and logarithmic curves, and their reverse functions. For a “logarithmic” fade out, the function would be y=ex*dB, where e is a number between 0 and 1; that is an exponential function showing decay. For fade ups, the function can be reversed to y=ex/dB to show an exponential increase in volume. Fucking confused, yet? YES!*
It’s been awhile since I’ve written anything, but I’ve been heaps busy. Though I’m forlorn to have starved the masses of my keen intellect and barbed wit, it’s been a necessary evil to hurl forward with a veritable slew of projects. Prepping for my wedding, a string of album layouts, recording, art… this website is but one of those projects.
No longer bound by Google (“do no evil, unless the NSA or the Chinese ask you to”), I’ve moved doktorsewage.com entirely onto a private server. I’ve rolled up my sleeves and gotten my itty bitty typing fingers dirty in the guts of WordPress, the amazing free and open source platform for building websites and blogs. Thank Bejebus, because I’m sick of hard coding html while I should be making art. Instead, now I can sift through CSS. A lateral move, really, except for the final result is far more satisfying.
From 1999 to 2011, I was in a band called Ludicra. It was a good run with four amazingly talented people. There were a lot of good times. The ending of the band wasn’t one of those good times. The feelings left behind could make one want to forget the whole endeavor. But all good things must come to an end, timely or otherwise… except the memories. Those can live on, and with music, they can live on loudly. This is what I intended.
In this age of information, a picture is worth a thousand lines of code. So what’s a song worth? I spent the last few months compiling all the recordings I had packed away. With the help of some websites, some free programs, and some D.I.Y. production work, I completed the total archive of Ludicra’s output over it’s 13 year existence, downloadable and free to all.
A couple months back shortly after returning from tour with Ludicra, I was watching the Melvins sound check after I’d delivered the posters I’d done for their show that night hastily over the past week. I mentioned to Justin from Secret Serpents standing next to me, “When I hear Jared sing and play bass, I really crave me some Big Business.” Justin replied, “They’re touring in August, you want in on the poster series?” Right… after… the Impaled tour. So, from one job that followed a Euro tour for me uncomfortably close, to another one that would follow the next Euro tour uncomfortably close. I couldn’t refuse the challenge!
Couple that challenge with the plane booking… Raul asked if I wanted to stay a few extra days in Europe, I said yes. That translated to him as nine extra days. That’s three times a few, by my reckoning. So, after the Impaled tour, being broke and strapped for time, I opted to stay with my friend Conny at her flat and get in some days drawing my poster. She set me up with some paper and an old German doctor’s desk (very fitting, I might say) and I got to work.