Grabber music: Drum Mic Mount

Dino used to do some vocals in Ghoul. He’d also done vocals for his previous bands, Asunder and Dystopia. It’s rare to find drummers who can also vocalize, and rarer that they aren’t ugly like Jimmy Marino of the Romantics. Well, one outta two ain’t bad. Dino can growl with the best of them while playing drums, and he wasn’t doing it anymore. I really wanted him back to singing on our upcoming tour.

Now if only we could get him to stop talking
Now if only we could get him to stop talking

At least one reason he gave up was the mic stand. For years, Dino had to have a big ass boom stand, balanced with the arm stretched all the way out, and placed oddly somewhere amongst his jungle of cymbal stands. This just doesn’t make sense and it’s a pain in the ass to set up. I’ve seen it lots of other times with other drummers mucking shit up and the mic flailing about.

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VH-140C Power jack fix

For our band, heretofore referred to as “Sean’s Band,” our guitarist Dan Randall uses my Ampeg VH-140C guitar head. He’s had a string of bad luck getting his own taken care of. My VH-140C is a great head I inherited from Impaled’s old guitarist, Leon del Muerte. It’s solid state and goes for cheap used, but makes the perfect compressed chugga chugga. That makes it the amp of choice for us, Pig Destroyer, Dying Fetus, Misery Index, and more. Leon left it behind, broken. I got it fixed and now it works again… sorta.

vh140c

Dan kept saying it was cutting out. I didn’t believe him, until I saw the distortion light blink out and come back while he was doing nothing. On a cursory inspection, I noticed the power jack did not seem tightly affixed on the back of the amp. Was it shaking out? It probably didn’t help we kept it on top of my bass rig.

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Building a better Rat trap

The ProCo Rat is a legendary pedal. It was designed by ProCo engineer Scott Burnham in 1978 in an attempt to build a better mouse trap, so to speak, compared to the pedals they were modding for customers. With some finesse, it can be dialed in as a fuzz, distortion or overdrive. It has a relatively simple distortion circuit built around a single LM308 opamp, itself now a coveted IC chip. It’s the tone on Metallica’s “Kill ’em All.” Legend has it two in a row were used for Carcass’s “Reek of Putrefaction.” Kurt Cobain, Thurston Moore, Kevin Shields, and Jeff Beck are all listed users (info from the always infallible Wikipedia). With the Rat2 in 1988, ProCo innovated again by adding what’s known as the Rat bypass, allowing true-bypass with a power indicating LED.

ProCo Rat 2

So what’s with the fucking battery cover? It sucks. Any time I see these pedals, the battery cover is long gone and the bottom is covered in icky duct tape leaving gummy residue all over the black box. The first one I got, a Rat2, was the same. Liberal amounts of Goo Gone were applied to clean the bastard. My friend gave me an original ’84 Rat. Again, no battery cover. All my friends with Rats? Duct taped battery covers.

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Lofty ideas #1

Impaled has managed to stay in the same practice place for about 14 years. Holy fuck, has it been that long? Jesus Christo, I don’t think the world asked for a teenaged Impaled. Zit faced and sullen, we have more attitude than ever.

Our space is in what it locally known as “The Old Soundwave,” in that there was a “new Soundwave” started by the original owner, the legendary Al Lucchesi, with some partners. He ditched that and now he just focuses on the original Soundwave. It’s still the old one, and we’re the oldest tenants there. You can read a good article about Al here from the Easy Bay Express. The place has hosted in it’s halls Neurosis, High on Fire, Forbidden, Exodus, Testament, Faith No More, and countless others.

photo by Tony U., from Yelp.com

In this humble space, we’ve written all our records, recorded a couple, filmed two music videos (parts of a third), and shared our space with the likes of Blown to Bits, Morbosidad, Stormcrow, and Worm Ouroboros. So, why, oh why, did it take us more than a decade to decide to build a loft? Fucking morons.

Sean and I enlisted the help of our dear friend and sometime gore collaborator, Scott Bryan. We set to work to build a loft. Finally. We moved most of our equipment into a space that was temporarily empty, much to our benefit. To keep things easy and do it all in a day, we decided to go with it being 8′ tall, because that’s the height that 4×4 wood lumber comes in. That’s just less cutting to do, and it’s a good height to roll full stacks out from under.

Our room is at a slight angle, but basically the width is around 14′. At first, Scott was insistent that we had to put a beam right in the middle of the loft for support. I really didn’t want to. Then a neighbor came by and suggested we really didn’t have to. Instead of just using four 2x4s for the base of the loft, we should use at least one 2×12 for the front. That’s one super thick chunk of board that was terribly unlikely to bend. That’s when Scott remembered, that for once, he didn’t have to build something to code. I mean, who would it hurt to try? Just Impaled.

We were lucky enough to have one back wall made of thick gypsum, or something… I don’t know. It’s a really tough wall to even put pushpins in, so we assumed it would be good. Point is, we were lucky to not have to use drywall anchors. We put up a long 2×4 as our starting base. Of course, we kept it all level as we could. A good device that I was unfamiliar with, not being a carpenter, was a chalk line. Basically, it’s a string you pull tight from one end to another and snap it… and you get a straight line anywhere, drawn in chalk. That was way easier than trying to find a ruler 14′ long.

From there, we attached the side panels. We made these 4′ long, because the plywood sheets we got were 8×4′, and I wanted to do as little cutting as possible. I’m lazy.

Finally the massive 2×12 board was attached. It was a pain to even get in our room, bending around the hallway and the gear that was already in the room.

For the joists, the supports for the ply, we used joist anchors on the back beam and then screwed right into them from the front. The anchors made it a lot easier for us. We didn’t have to try and make the frame and THEN attach it to the wall. The joists were spaced about 2′ apart, because Scott told us this was standard. Hell if I know, I just know it all worked.

Next, we screwed in the 4×4 posts on each corner. Really, this thing was free hanging just fine, but I figured the posts would add a psychological comfort to the drummers who had to sit underneath this monstrosity. Finally, we put up two sheets of plywood, with a slight cut in one of them to match our angled wall. This thing was as solid as a poop after mac ‘n’ cheese.

There was some bitching by the drummers about sound, so I padded the corners and under the plywood (in between each joist) with foam. That seemed to solve the problem, and now everyone is happy we have less shit all over the floor. You can imagine, after 14 years, we’ve gathered a lot of shit.

The materials cost us somewhere around $100. Priceless, when I think of how it made our space infinitely more comfortable. On top of that, it only took a day. Nice. Scott Bryan is our man. He can be contacted by any other Bay Area bands looking for a good guy for a cheap price to help them build a loft at mistermeat138@yahoo.com. Or, get off your lazy ass and give it a go yourself. You can build a small one, a big one, but if you hurt yourself, I’m gonna 1. laugh, and 2. tell you right now that I told you not to without the help of a parent or guardian.

Oh yeah… don’t forget to decorate when you get chance with stripper rope lights. It makes your music sexier.

Doktor Ross Sewage
Minister vom Drek
www.doktorsewage.com

Tuna Footswitch

I bought my SVT2 Pro from my friend Janis sometime in the late nineties for about $800. I really had no idea what it was, just that it said Ampeg like all the other bass players had and that it was very, very heavy. It must be good, because it weighs a lot, and was dubbed by Incantation as “the fucking brick” on Impaled’s tour with them in 2000. It had been on tour with Janis while she played in Stone Fox and L7. I guessed it was pretty good, but I was still too busy trying to learn to play and keep up with my bandmates who’d all been playing years longer than I to actually read about my purchase.


After a love / hate relationship with constant amp breakdowns for a decade, I finally figured out the SVT2 Pro had a vent on the side. I also figured out Ohms, and that I’d been abusing this poor thing for years with incorrect speaker hook ups. Sometimes, realizing my stupidity overwhelms me.

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vintage MXR Phase 90 sees the light

The MXR Phase 90 is kind of the benchmark for phasers. It’s been made famous by being THE phaser for Mr. Eddie Van Halen and a score of others. It’s a four stage phaser with matched jfets, meaning in plain talk that it sounds tits. It’s a smooth sounding phaser with a rich tonality. There are many versions since it was first introduced in the 70s: the original script logo version, the first block letter version, the originals with added LED indicator, and then the many re-issues since the Dunlop company bought the rights to the MXR name. The quality of the version, if you go by general opinion, is almost always commensurate with the age.

old script mxr pedals

I was looking for and older one of these, and finally scored a block logo, non-LED version that I’ve dated as being made around 1978. It’s roughly the same kind Mr. Van Halen likely used. This is one of the “good ones.” I can definitely vouch for the sound, being that my Phase 90 sounds amazing on bass or guitar.

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BOSS DD-3 ECHO Echo echo mod

I really don’t have a love for BOSS pedals. I don’t like them, actually. Don’t get me wrong, they usually do what they’re intended to do, come fairly cheap, and are easily replaceable. They also represent a time in the music world when everything started to become digitized, compact, and lose it’s soul. To me, BOSS Pedals are to music gear as Phil Collins taking over vocals is to Genesis.

That said, there’s a time and place for everything. I found a BOSS DD3 at a show. No one claimed it. So, on the plus side, it was free. It’s a solid enough digital delay. Heartless, but it gets the job done and has good delay time. But it ain’t analog.

Boss DD-3 Digital Delay Pedal

People harp on and on about the analog sound. What is analog sound? It’s the sound of error, not exactness. It’s the warm pops and hisses on vinyl, it’s the warble and clipping on a tape, and it’s the way a delay device further muddies the sound of each repeated echo. That’s something people pay a lot of big bucks for when they pick up an old 70s tape echo machine or even an early eighties delay that uses BBD chips. It’s analog, it has error, and in some ways that’s a nicer sound to most human ears. Of course, you don’t get the extended delay times of a digital delay like the DD3, but you can fake the analog and keep the digital.

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Gross Anatomy: Torche / Big Business poster

A couple months back shortly after returning from tour with Ludicra, I was watching the Melvins sound check after I’d delivered the posters I’d done for their show that night hastily over the past week. I mentioned to Justin from Secret Serpents standing next to me, “When I hear Jared sing and play bass, I really crave me some Big Business.” Justin replied, “They’re touring in August, you want in on the poster series?” Right… after… the Impaled tour. So, from one job that followed a Euro tour for me uncomfortably close, to another one that would follow the next Euro tour uncomfortably close. I couldn’t refuse the challenge!

18 x24", five colors, edition of 100
For sale in the Sewage Shop

Couple that challenge with the plane booking… Raul asked if I wanted to stay a few extra days in Europe, I said yes. That translated to him as nine extra days. That’s three times a few, by my reckoning. So, after the Impaled tour, being broke and strapped for time, I opted to stay with my friend Conny at her flat and get in some days drawing my poster. She set me up with some paper and an old German doctor’s desk (very fitting, I might say) and I got to work.

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