This last weekend, I was helping my wife out taking some band photos of our friends’ band, Serpent Crown. At one point I hoisted her on my shoulders to try for a bird’s eye view. I was reminded of seven years previous, going through some similar extreme measures to get photographs for Ludicra’s The Tenant. I wasn’t blogging at the time, stupidly, so here’s a Throwback Thursday post about this cover.
At the time this came out in 2009, some people commented “why did they photoshop a dumb door onto the water?” Well, fuck you. First, don’t use a product name as a verb in a sentence. Second, Photoshop was not involved in editing this door into a body of water. It was me and my own damn two hands what did the work putting a real door into a real body of water.
Musical instruments, good ones, are often compared to one’s children. Well, how many children are thrown in a case, plucked, hammered on, plugged into, or hanged? Don’t answer that. (Please, really, don’t.) Without these precious musical items, though, it’s hard to call oneself a musician. That is, lest ye fortunate to have the talent of Susan Boyle (hopefully not the face). My favorite, my child, my baby, my fifth limb… my B.C. Rich Ironbird. This thing is a mother fucker.
It’s an American made (or at least assembled, I dunno) classic, with the big “R” inlay on the headstock indicating its origin in the land of the free. Birthed sometime around THIRTY FUCKING YEARS AGO, it’s got neck-through construction, a rosewood fretboard, and a simple one-knob configuration. Because metal don’t need a fucking tone knob. I scored it over a decade ago at a used-music shop in San Jose for a meager $300, during a period where “metal” was a dirty word and Prodigy was the band of the future (where are they know?). It’s been with me on countless tours and tons of recordings.
Hammers of Misfortune is the brainchild of my bandmate in Ludicra, Sir John “Cadbury” Cobbett. They are in the midst of working on a new record to be released on Metal Blade sometime in the future.
I got the call from John. “I need my pedal back.” Crap. The pedal I was supposed to fine tune. Oops. Oh well, I got it working, at least. Problem is, I was working in Oakland, and John is hard at work in South San Francisco. And it’s rush hour. So I guess after getting here I’m sticking around and writing about what the fuck Hammers is nailing down.
Who wants to buy CDs anymore? Playing live doesn’t really pay the bills of touring like it used to. You fucking nitwits who download everything are too blame. Of course, I’m a fucking nitwit, too, and Aesop has a blog that’s nothing BUT musical downloads. We are the problem and the victims.
Now that I’m working at Monolith Press, the fucking BEST rock poster shop (fuck, if I’m printing, it must be) and there’s more and more business as musical acts look to other avenues to generate the all essential dough to pay the bills. Of course, in 2012, when the world ends and there’s no more oil, forget about touring and learn how to fight zombies. For now, though, novel items like a concert poster are in vogue. Try and download a screen print, turkey.
Indeed, the Emperor has new clothes, and they apparently consist of a Ludicra shirt. I didn’t know that old coot was so cool. I bet Darth is more into NSBM and Burzum, though. He’s racist against the sand people.
The Ludicra show last Saturday was real neat. I like the Hazmat, and I think everyone had a swell time. Rebel’s Advocate and Born/Dead both really kicked a lot of butt.
The Ludicra mini-tour went fantastically. I seriously couldn’t have hoped to have more fun and success.
It’s unfortunate I have to say “mini-tour” because Ludicra needs to get out more. Not only do all of us all of a sudden become healthier on the road, but I can see it in all our brains, that we need to rock (we have clear skull plates, I swear). There’s a lot of love put into Ludicra, even evidenced by Aesop telling us, his bandmates, about how much he loves working with us (what a fucking fag). I think we all feel the same about each other and the music we create.
… the more questions I have. But that’s rad… my life is an excellent, interesting, and entertaining diversion from my life.
Not the last Nile record though… that’s kinda boring, as I’m finding out.
The new Ludicra, though, which I have a finished copy of in my hands, is the opposite of that. You know, it’s fun being a member of an award-winning band that kills everything else on the planet. Yes… even better than the Beatles.
And let’s not even get started on the next Impaled… yeesh, I’m lucky to be working with some of the most amazing musicians and artists around. And they… are lucky to be working with me.